Castiel's Brothers
by Ruler of the Fake Empire
Summary: Castiel tells a story from his childhood.


The church is huge and mostly made of strong brick and glass. The stain glass windows makes mad patterns on the street, the sunlight shinning through the through the images of some angelic christ that never really did anything since he died, except apparently came back to life.

Sam and Dean Winchester walk fast, their broad shoulders tense, their faces already stern and cold. A man behind them by the name of Castiel walks slower, his eyes scanning the premises, head swinging around like he is trying to take in everything at once. Unlike the brothers he wears a long tan coat that flaps behind him. The air moves strangely around his shoulder's, like something unseen is there. His eyes are sad and his dark hair is ruffled. The brothers pretend not to notice him, or at least, not endeared by him. It doesn't work. Especially with the way that the taller one will occasionally turn back to him and gesture for him to keep up.

The shorter one, Dean, mutters something under his breath.

They walk into the church, not expecting anyone to be there. The day is dying on a tuesday, not normally the preaching time of day. Castiel briefly touches the wood of the door, staring down at his hand as it slips past. He feels the coolness of the wood. He can't actually remember what the case it, or why they need to be in a church, but he isn't that fussed. He is just tagging along really. Plus there is a really nice burger place around the corner.

He mutters something and moves in-between the pews, fingertips dragging on every available surface as if to keep him grounded.

The coloured stains from the windows light up the large space. He moves slowly and sits in the front pew, staring up at the mural of angel children playing in the clouds. He stares almost blankly, head cocked to one side. He blinks slowly and the brothers come and sit by him on the pew, as if trying to see things from where he was. The lightened slabs of glass light up their faces and the angels seem to continue to play mindlessly in the clouds. In the middle was a small boy holding a babe is smiling, eyes blue as the sky.

"Looks like you, Cas," Dean jokes, trying to lift a smile from the man in the trench coat. For a moment Castiel only blinks and both brothers watch, wondering if they broke something.

"That is me." He points. "There, right in the middle." His eyes seemed dull, like he was no longer with them. The taller Whinchester turned his head to the side, staring at the little boy and the baby in his arms.

"Who's the babe, Castiel?" His brother always called Cas Cas, but Sam was very fond of saying his full name. It made him feel like he was acknowledging that Cas was Castiel, that he had had a life before them.

"That was Samandrial, when he was very small." For a moment it looks at though the man in the long tan coat is going to cry, but then he leans back, a breath shuddering from his chest. Dean looks at him with something akin to concern, watching carefully as the angel recoveres his wits.

The angel points a little behind the young boy and his babe to two men standing together and peering down at them. Smiling.

"Thats Michael and Lucifer, before they got angry." His voice is thick with remembrance and some deep and aching sadness. He points again to another boy, seemingly a little older than the child version of Castiel. The boy played near Cas and Alfie, though his eyes seemed to be glued to the two despite him seemingly looking in the other direction. "Thats Gabriel, he was going to go find Balthazar, but Lucifer wouldn't let him." Both the brothers look towards him with curious expressions.

"You mean this actually happened?" Dean's voice is accusing and confused. Castiel gives him a look.

"You think that they just make random scenes? Read the bible, Dean. This was the feast of fruitfulness. Lucifer, Michael, Samandrial, Gabriel, Balthazar and I went to the far side of heaven to commemorate the walking of the fish. Nobody else would come, nobody thought it was a good idea to let the fish walk up on the land." Castiel pauses again, his eyes fading. "I remember Balthazar wandering off to see the fish, sneaking past Micheal and begging me not to tell. Gabriel had wanted to badly to go after him that Lucifer took him to go find our brother, leaving me and Samandrial with Michael. It was so nice. Samandrial was a good babe and I liked him. He clung to my finger all day until he had to go back to the nursery." He smiles slightly, but it is not a happy smile.

"I didn't know angels were kids," Dean murmurs, mostly to himself. His eyes like his brother's are turned to the stain glass. His face blank though not as heart wrenching at Castiel's own.

Cas' eyes slide to him.

"All things were once children, Dean. Me included. When we were this young we had to eat and sleep as well. For the first thirty years of our lives we were looked after much like human babes. The older angels would look after the little ones. It was always Michael and Lucifer who looked after me and my immediate brothers. Raphael and Urial had thought it a bad idea to have anymore children, but both Lucifer and Michael had insisted that it was what our father wanted." Castiel's eyes click around the stain glass windows, absorbing everything he can. He is silent though.

Sam looks at him with his big, brown eyes. Noticing that they had never really asked Castiel about the time before they had met them, before he had raised Dean from perdition.

"Go on with the story," he commands, curiosity overwhelming his need for politeness. Castiel looks at him with surprise, but he opens him mouth to continue anyway.

"Anna had wanted to come with us, but Raphael had forbidden it. I believe he was being influenced by Zachariah at the time." He blinked slowly. "After Lucifer had taken Gabriel it was almost night and I was… falling asleep. Michael had taken the babe from me and I wanted to find the others. I wandered off down to earth." He pauses again, looking around as if surprised to find himself telling to story. He is even more surprised to find both the brothers hanging on his every word. They gesture for him to continue. "I tried to find them, going down to the beach where the fish crawled up. I had seen the sea many times before, but in general the little ones weren't allowed out at night. It wasn't safe. I was fascinated. I now realise that I should of gone home as soon as I knew that my brother's weren't there, but the stars were brighter then than they are now. They were so beautiful and I couldn't leave. I walked along the beach pretending that I was looking for my brothers, but they weren't there. They were just gone. I walked and walked, along another beach and another beach until I didn't know where I was anymore. I didn't find them, I believe now that they went home. I remember falling asleep under a tree, curling up, to tired to return to heaven. I was too young to be tracked at the time and my brothers panicked. They searched for me the whole night and most of the morning. When I awoke Lucifer had found me. He was clinging to my shoulder, shaking me, yelling at me to wake up. When I opened my eyes he was staring at me, terrified. I wondered if something bad had happened. I was cold and hungry and confused. Apparently I had contracted hypothermia, I was so cold. I was too little to be healed. He was scared and angry and he yelled at me, wrapping me in a blanket as tightly as he could and dragging me back to heaven.

"When we got there Gabriel was crying and Balthazar was yelling, but I don't know who he was yelling at. I was crying too, I didn't know what was going on, I was too little to understand. First Lucifer yelled at me, he yelled at me and then he yelled at Michael for letting me wander off. They had ended up yelling at each other for so long that Raphael had commanded that they stop, because they were scaring the little ones.

"I remember Gabriel and Balthazar holding me and cursing me at the same time. Urial and Zachariah must of joined the search at one time. They were standing back and glaring. Even though Zachariah looked as though he was going to start yelling at me too, he made me soup and let me sleep with Lucifer and Michael. Everyone was so angry and so worried.

"I remember Lucifer apologising to me about yelling and making me promise not to walk away again if I wasn't with one of the older angels. I had promised him without hesitation. I know that he made both Balthazar and Gabriel promise to look after me. Both of them were crying and they promised whole heartedly, before begging to be able to sleep with me, Lucifer and Michael that night. They didn't admit it, but I believe that they all thought I was going to walk off again, like I had done before.

"I remember. Michael picking me up off the ground and holding me and telling me how worried he had been. After that I got very sick, being in the cold for so long wasn't good for me and I was so little. Gabriel had stayed by my side most days telling me jokes and bringing me drawings from Balthazar. Michael would stay by my side whole days while I was ill with fever. I think he blamed himself for my wandering off. Lucifer was there most days too. He would read me stories and make me every herbal tea he knew of. The two argued a lot while I was sick. Lucifer wanted to heal me, despite how dangerous it was. I think that he… that he just wanted me to get better. He was never one for avoiding confrontation. Michael didn't think so. He was convinced that it would kill me.

"I remember on one day Gabriel coming into Michael and Lucifer's room, he was crying hard. Balthazar came in after him looking solemn. I was told later that the reason they were so upset was because Lucifer had gotten so angry and so desperate that he had told them that I was probably going to die. It took Michael, Lucifer, Zachariah, Raphia and Urial to calm them down. At one point I believe that Balthazar was going to talk to god. The two of them made speeches to the sky about how one of god's children was dying and he was doing nothing. They were so angry at him. But then… but then I got better, I started to get out of bed more, I gained weight, my fever broke. I remember Gabriel hugging me. I remember all of my brothers making sure where I was for years afterward. I remember how frantic they would get if I walked out of sight. I remember it so clearly." By the time he finished it was clear he wasn't really their anymore. Not quite. His mind was somewhere in the clouds, with his brothers. Slowly each of the Winchester brothers slung their arms around the angel's shoulders and they sat in silence like ancient stone statues.


End file.
